Xiè Xiè (Shei Shei) in Shanghai: The survival guide that they never put in your tour book (Part I)

Ok - Ok - Ok: This version is not about all about food, but who can resist telling our tale of China

The Guidebook and Map

Like any good tourist planning to stay three weeks in a foreign country, we picked up the Lonely Planet Guide to Mandarin. I thought to myself that I would pick up some good phrases to use with the locals. Sadly, the truth is that there is no way that you would be able to spit out these words and actually converse with the locals. In addition, I must ask, when was the last time you used these phrases when you traveled in China (my personal favorite phrases in the lonely planet phrasebook), and really, would you really understand the response if you were actually comprehensible (trust me – it has taken much practice to say Xiè Xiè (or thank you) in Manderin:

I’m an atheist (p. 139): Wŏ xìn wúshénlùn.

You’re just using me for sex (p. 138): Ní zhĭ shì yòngwŏ fàng qíngyù.

Do you have Lonely Planet guidebooks (p. 84): Yŏuméiyŏu lónelí pŭlānáitè de lǚyóu zhĭnán shū? (Is that not a plug? I’m reading from one – why need I ask?)

This item is a fake (p. 80): Zhèshì jiăhuò (Nooooo!).

Don’t get me wrong, the book has been very useful when there has been an impasse in signaling gestures and exchanging words in Mandarin and English. I have whipped that puppy out only to hear “Oh – yes, yes! Cotton (or glass – you just fill in the word). However, you are not going to use these little books for much more. So it occurred to me why aren't there real travel guides for surviving a foreign country such as China. As you will see, really there are only a few phrases to know (if briefly in the country)!

In contrast to the guidebook, the map was an invaluable thing! For $8.50, it was probably a bit expensive to buy; however, our use made it priceless. This map has both the main roads in Shanghai and the metro line. It became a lifeline and you will receive no strange looks when you whip it out for consultation at the moment of total confusion. Shanghai streets are labeled in both Chinese letters as well as Roman alphabet so it is useful for navigating the city by taxi, metro, or foot. The map is wonderful – invest in one!

Shopping

Chinese put Americans to shame in this department. There are more malls and shopping centers here than you can imagine ~ makes New York look light-weight. There are large malls that range from high-end Tiffany and Gucci to moderate priced (Kohl’s type stores) to bottom basement bargains for which I cannot liken them to any American stores. I believe that there must be a regulation that these stores must have at least five stories with each escalator taking you to a new floor of clothing, house wares, and jewelry. There is Carrefour and Lotus – Wal-Mart-like stores that sell cheap Chinese goods (it seems more ironic though to see “Made in China” in English on these items). There are little glass cages (8x8 feet) endlessly framing the halls of the metro, simulating scaled-down versions of the larger stores. After seeing only a few of these stores, your eyes begin to glaze over. Most are uninteresting – especially those malls placed conveniently in the tourist sections such as Nan Jing Road. However, it is the knock-off vendors that emerge from nowhere every ten feet, which make the shopping experience truly memorable.

Lady, Lady – DVD? Gucci? Rolex?

“Lady-Lady, you want watch? Bags? DVD? Gucci, Prada? Same shopping ~ Cheaper, cheaper ~ Follow me. Just looky-looky.” Hmmm – following a stranger down a filthy alley – that sounds safe. Initially, it was funny and I couldn’t help but laugh. By the third day, we maneuvered through the maze of vendors like seasoned pros.

Rule one: Don’t speak to these people – not even to say no or you will have a friend for life or at least for several blocks.

Rule two: Ask Frank Hu, super-manager of our serviced apartment, how to say “Go away!” in Mandarin. This may be the most important phrase you can learn and conveniently missing from our travel guide. Memorize it! It is pronounced toe-kuy (rhymes with guy). Pronounced in a firm voice, they will immediately leave. Use only when they will not leave you alone. However, start first with “Boo-yao” (meaning “no need”). This usually works unless they persist.

We learned the first rule on our first morning in a quest for Starbucks. We made contact with D who has been living here for two and one half years. “Where is the closest Starbucks?” Like lightning, we received an email, courtesy of D’s colleagues, that outlined all the Starbucks on Nan Jing Road. While there are literally nine on Nan Jing Road, they were impossible to find (we later discovered that this is because, except for one, the others are on Nan Jing West and we were on Nan Jing East). Thus, we wandered around in a pre-coffee glaze searching for the magic green sign

As we walked down the street, my five-foot eight-inch stature and blonde hair was like a neon light flashing “TOURIST.” We were approached by one of the knock-off vendors. B, delusional without caffeine, responded, “no, no. No watch – coffee.” This phrase was enough for one eager salesperson to personally find the Starbucks with the hopes that we would purchase a bag, a watch, or a postcard. Fortunately, our leisurely time spent drinking our morning coffee discouraged him and he sauntered off looking for another westerner.

As an aside, Shanghai has its bargains, but it stops at Starbucks, as well as western food in general. Starbucks prices are the same as everywhere else. Realizing that the closest Starbucks was a taxi-ride away ($1.50 each way) and coffee for two was $6.00, we decided that with two and one half weeks in China, we would be smart to buy a coffee press and make our own.

We learned the second rule after our adventures to a local market that probably never sees many western tourists. Frank recommended a market that was walking distance from our apartment. He claimed it was the largest in Shanghai. Not knowing what to expect, we headed out toward the market. As we unknowingly approached a large building which we would learn was the market, we were surrounded by five men.

Now don’t worry, China is amazingly safe for tourista, with only minor crimes (watch your pockets at night on the Bund) so we did not worry as they approached. Within seconds, the chiming sound of “Lady, Lady – Rolex, Gucci, Prada” started as predictably as chimes on a bell tower. Set on making a sale, they guided us to the building. This was truly one of the largest markets we could imagine and one not frequented by many western tourists so we were targeted.

The experience was a refreshing dichotomy of the sterile stores on Nan Jing Road and it was exhausting. At one point we were trailed by at least six people hoping to guide us to their store. Briefly, I felt a twinge of compassion for the Hollywood socialites with their constant barrage of Paparazzi. We were superstars! Despite these overbearing vendors, this market also had a lot of vendors that were polite and noninvasive. We were able to lose some of the vendors when B snapped “I will not buy anything from you because you annoy me!” I doubt they understood the words but they did understand the tone.

After seeing a t-shirt with the word “Flat Out Bean,” B wanted her own and she was bound to traverse the seven stories of the market to find it. To her dismay, it was naught to be had. However, there were many t-shirts with nonsensical phrases in English – I wonder what they thought as we pointed to a shirt and burst out laughing. We managed to buy two shirts – one with a picture of Marilyn Monroe and the printed phrase Twiggy! The other shirt sounded hilarious – “Naturally JoJo” – only to find out that there is an actual store. Unfortunately, they are getting better and better at avoiding mistakes in the names of popular brands. For those of you that wish to still find those illusive t-shirts, we recommend Carrefour where we found: “Always be happy with Murphy,” “Quilt Pig,” and our personal favorite “Spring Ethnic Nights.”

I would highly recommend a trip to a market like this for any of those adventuring souls. Not only did we amuse ourselves for hours, we were touched by a culture that one will not see in the main tourist areas. While slightly annoying, these vendors were simply hoping to make a sale and were in no way harmful. But if you go – remember the phrases “Boo-Yao” for the initial approach, but if they will not leave you alone, remember “Toe-Kuy!”

Bargaining

Another fundamental thing that you should know is the art of bargaining and when and where it is appropriate. Bargains are to be had in Shanghai but you must also know when and where. Sometimes it is appropriate; sometimes it is no different than the US.

One of our first outings was to what I call the “knock-off” market, which can be found at the Shanghai Science & Technology Museum Metro Stop. The original market was moved out of the Tourist Area as a government nod to the protection of Intellectual Property Rights. In this location, all bargaining goes, especially to the dismay of the vendors. Now B noted that the movement of this market lost the charm of the old market in which they followed you throughout the market much like our experience at the clothing market. Now they each have their little kiosks and they only beg for a sale until you move on to the next kiosk. Nevertheless, they persuade you to purchase “Tiffany, Tiffany, Gucci, Prada – yadda, yadda, yadda.”

What is most amusing is that they pretend it is the real thing. Only one vendor actually said, “No, but really good fake.” Thus, they start with prices around 280 RMB (approximately $40). I asked B, “How do you bargain here?” She replied, “Oh, they give you a price, you respond offended, walk away, and they chase you.” Seriously, I didn’t think this was true. Indeed, it is true. By the time you finish, you should be able to get what you like for 25 RMB (approximately $3) to 75 RMB ($10). If you pay more, you are crazy.

The exception: DVDs. When B visited the old market, the DVDs were everywhere. We learned quickly that the “openness” of this market has changed. Now, they keep the illegally copied DVDs out of sight. However, once B spoke up and said “where are the DVDs,” the vendors appeared from nowhere to guide her to their kiosk only to find them hidden in drawers. B was able to purchase the first three seasons of a popular American TV series (selling at home for $100) for $20. Score!!

In stark contrast, there is no bargaining (obviously) in the main malls that do not differ from our malls. There may be a little room to negotiate at the kiosk in the subway; however, a rule of thumb is that if the price is on the item, the less likelihood of bargaining. In addition, the more likelihood that the price is on the item, the more likelihood that you won’t be ripped off.